The Second Time Around
by midnightexpress
Summary: Will things ever be the same especially after six months of two secret lives?
1. Chapter 1

They started out as friends, but just six months ago it felt as though everything in the world had changed. When they were friends, it never felt exactly right to her. When they weren't, everything just wasn't the same. Nothing made her feel better and it felt as though everything in the world was just going downhill.  
  
They started arguing, over the little and stupid things, making everything so much worse than before. Then all of a sudden she just gave up. Things were never going to be the same, and at the rate they were going the arguing wasn't going to help either. She just felt as though nothing was worth it and everything should stop.  
  
I just wanted out, she thinks. What is so wrong with that? Oh wait, now I remember. Everything comes rushing back into her mind. The whole thing was not handled the best way. I didn't exactly know why I wanted out, nor do I still know. I think I made up another lame excuse to just end it.  
  
This is great. Another day alone, another boring day, why doesn't anyone call me???  
  
Phone rings  
  
Perfect timing. I wonder who it is. She glances at the caller id, and everything comes rushing back into her head.  
  
She remembers all the great times. The way he used to make her laugh, and the way he could just talk about anything and everything. She missed those times, but maybe they were coming back.  
  
"Hello." Wow, she thinks, just like old times. I can't believe we are actually talking again.  
  
"Hi!"  
  
"How are you?" Is this really happening, I mean I thought we ended things pretty badly, how come he is calling me.  
  
"Good, how about you?" Whoa, did I just say that, oh well too late.  
  
At least she is talking to me again, he thinks, maybe we can be friends. "I'm good."  
  
Hmmm.. this is an awkward silence. Maybe I should say something. "That's good." Okay, so maybe that wasn't the best thing to say, at least I broke the silence.  
  
She is actually talking to me. Although I don't see why she wouldn't be. I mean she was the one who wanted out. I might have pushed her to that though. I swear I didn't mean to. "So what are you doing tonight?"  
  
Is he asking me out again??? "Ummm... well nothing that I know of. How about you? Got any plans?"  
  
"Nope, well I thought about going to a movie. Would you like to come?" Why am I asking her this? We both remember how it turned out before. Maybe it can be different. Maybe we can be friends. Please just say yes, I would really like to see you again.  
  
"Sure." What the heck, maybe it will end differently this time.  
  
She arrives at the theater, not really knowing what to expect or think. I wonder what this is going to lead to?  
  
As she is thinking of all the possibilities, she sees his face again.  
  
Wow, she looks great.  
  
"So what movie should we see?"  
  
Right now at the moment I am not really sure who this is going to be, so review and tell me whom you think it should be. Thanks! 


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews! I would like to say I am just writing for fun and am not getting anything for it. The characters do not belong to me either. And just for your information, the italicized scene is a flashback. Hope you enjoy.  
  
"Umm... how about we see this one?" Sara silently thinks to herself what is this movie about anyway. Oh well too late we are already buying the tickets.  
  
"That sounds great." Wow, I never expected her to see this. She definitely has changed in the last six months.  
  
"Should we get anything to snack on? Popcorn? Candy? Drink?" Nick asked.  
  
"I think I want some..."  
  
"Shock tarts." Nick said for her.  
  
"You still remember that." How impressive Sara thought. It has been six months and he still remembers my favorite candy.  
  
"Of course I still remember that. You only got Shock Tarts every single chance you could."  
  
"The movie is starting in five minutes, we should pay for all this stuff and go in."  
  
"Good idea, let's go."  
  
"That was a pretty good movie, considering." Sara said as they were walking out.  
  
"Yeah, I thought it was great. All the action." Nick added.  
  
"Of course you thought it was great. You guys are all alike. It's all about the action to you.  
  
"Okay, okay. So what do you want to do now? We could go get some coffee and catch up maybe."  
  
"You know what that actually sounds like a good idea. And while we are at it you can catch me up on what has been going on at the lab since I have been gone."  
  
"Alright well I will do that only if you tell me what you have been doing since you left. And.."  
  
"You want to know why I left, don't you?"  
  
"Well of course I do. I mean it was just really kind of random that we walk into the break room and you announce that you won't be coming back and that we are through. No explanation, just that you are sorry. Then you just say goodbye and walk out."  
  
"I don't think you would understand but, I guess if you catch me up I might consider telling you why I left." As Sara was thinking this she decided that if he really wanted to know why she left and all the details she would just make them up. He doesn't need to know the truth. Nor will he want to know the truth. I cannot let him find out.  
  
"Great. So should we get going?" Nick finally asked her.  
  
"Of course, let's go." Sara said, although she wasn't to sure that this was going to be as fun as she thought it was going to be.  
  
All of my problems started when I realized that everything was too much. I can't handle anything. I love my job, but sometimes it is just too much. I love the people I work with, but yet sometimes I just can't stand to be around them. And then there is Nick. I love being around him. Having his arms around me. However the thing is that sometimes I just feel that it is too much. It is as though he isn't listening to me. It is as if no one is listening to me. I just need a way out.  
  
"Sara are you okay?" Nick asked. He had been sitting there watching her stare off into space for about fifteen minutes now.  
  
"What? Oh yeah I'm fine. Sorry just a little tired I guess. Go on keep telling me about everyone." She responds after realizing she had drifted off into her own little world. Trying to come up with a possible story for the question that she knew was coming.  
  
"Well as I was saying Greg is his crazy self, as usual. Although he has actually found a girl that he hasn't scared away. Warrick keeps working his butt off. I guess trying to keep his mind off gambling. We are all happy for him, it seems like he is finally recovering, at least for now anyway. But it is a day at a time process. Then Catherine, well she is working as hard as any of us, if not harder, although she has earned a vacation coming up with Lindsey. I think that she is taking her to the beach. She keeps saying Lindsey has wanted to go there for years, and well now they finally have the chance. And I guess that leaves Grissom. Well, he is staying in his keeping to himself state. But he is going with Lindsey and Catherine to the beach. Only because Lindsey insisted, well according to Cath."  
  
"Wow, it seems as though the gang is getting along great."  
  
"Yeah we are. But the only thing is that we all still miss you. Okay, now that I told you about everyone, it is your turn to tell me why you left."  
  
Sara takes a deep breath, and then prepares to tell Nick the lie she had been practicing in her mind over and over the whole time he was talking. 


	3. Chapter 3

I still do not own anything. For full disclaimer check out chapter 2! Oh yeah and as a reminder all scenes in italics are flashbacks. Thanks for reading!!  
  
"Well you see," Sara started. "I can't do this."  
  
"What? You can't do what? Sara I don't understand."  
  
"Nick, I was going to tell you I swear I was, but at the time it was just easier to leave. But then when you called, I had to see you. And then when you asked me earlier for coffee and asked me to tell you the truth about everything I was just going to lie. But I can't, just by looking in your face I cannot lie to you. Not about this.  
  
Nick just sat and stared at Sara. He could not believe he was telling him this. This is not like her. Nor was her running away. There has got to be some reasoning behind all of it. He thought silently to himself, as he waited for Sara to start talking again.  
  
Nick asked her to move in, he had no idea what he was in for when she said she was. But she was determined to change and hid all her secrets from him. Well for a while anyway, she thought to herself. I will tell him, eventually. It just hasn't come up. No need bringing up something that is of no importance right now.  
  
Stop trying to fool yourself, Sara. She thought to herself. This is of importance right now and will always be.  
  
Maybe I can hide it, just for a little while. He doesn't have to know right now does he? Not when we are so happy together. Everything is so simple and care free. I just want things to stay that way.  
  
But he does, and this is life is everything but simple and care free and no matter how much you want things to stay that way you gave that chance up a long time ago.  
  
True, but still I can pretend can't I? I've done it before and things turned out fine.  
  
No they didn't. This is how this whole thing started. This is how everything began. How can you think that everything is going to turn out fine, if you don't admit it.  
  
"Sara, hello earth to Sara." Nick had been watching her for about ten minutes. She had that same look the whole time. It was as though some memory was playing over and over in her head. It was as though she was debating with herself whether or not to say something aloud or to just keep quiet.  
  
"What, oh sorry. I don't think I'm ready to talk yet, but maybe in a little while. How about we call it a night. Then meet up some other time."  
  
"Sara, are you sure. I mean we don't have to. I have all the time in the world. I always have when it comes to you. You just have to ask for it. You know that right?"  
  
"Of course, look I have to go now, bye."  
  
"Wait don't leave..." But before he could finish his sentence she was gone again.  
  
I can't believe I just did that. How could I blow him off like that?  
  
You have done it before, what would have made this time any different? She asked herself.  
  
I don't know. Maybe if I had actually told him why I ran away the first time. But I can't. I have no idea why.  
  
Yes you do. You just don't want to admit it.  
  
Stop it. Snap out of it. I just need to find a way to relax. She pulled out the all to familiar comforter. But this time, she pauses and then just looks out it.  
  
"Is it worth it?" She asks the question aloud, although she thinks she already knows the answer.  
  
Please review and tell me any suggestions and comments. Thanks!!! 


	4. Chapter 4

Still don't own anything. Full disclaimer is on chapter 2. Please review! Thanks.  
  
She knew the answer. It was not worth it. She couldn't help it though. She had to turn to it.  
  
She just took two. She knew it wasn't going to help anything. However, she did it anyway. Besides what could two little pills do?  
  
She suddenly felt the effect it was having on her. This was a familiar feeling that she had so loved at one time.  
  
But this time, it was not the feeling she wanted. It was different. And she knew that the reason was that she this was wrong.  
  
Nick thought something was very wrong. He had tried calling Sara three times. He knew that something was very weird with the way she left so fast.  
  
Maybe she wasn't feeling well and isn't able to answer the phone. If that is the case then I really should go and check on her. He thought this out fully and then decided that it was the best thing he could possibly do. He didn't see any other ways.  
  
Sara was suddenly getting very dizzy. This isn't the reaction I remember. But this works too. I just need to forget everything. And I am this is great.  
  
Nick hoped into his car. He sped all the way to Sara's apartment, but he just had a nagging feeling that something just wasn't right. He had to get to her. He just had to.  
  
It was not something that he could explain to anyone just something he was feeling inside. But his feelings had never betrayed him before.  
  
Sara fell to the floor. As she fell she hit her head. Blood started going all over the floor.  
  
The bad feeling Nick had, just got worse. Oh no, he thought. I have to get to Sara. I have to.  
  
Sara felt as though she was in a black spiraling hole. Everything was just getting worse. Everything was getting darker and darker. She needed Nick now. She had made the wrong choice. Would Nick come after her? She wondered this question many times before.  
  
So what did you think? I hoped you like. Sorry it is really short, but I thought I should update. Please review and if you do I will update. By the way sorry I took a while to update, but thanks for reading! 


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for all the reviews! I don't own anything for the full disclaimer please see chapter 2. Thanks. Sorry about the long delay of this chapter and I promise the chapters will start getting longer.  
  
Nick was just outside Sara's apartment when he heard a thud. The bad feeling that he was in the pit of his stomach made him want to throw up. He knocked on her door, but was not expecting her to answer.  
  
After about one minute of waiting for Sara to answer, he decided to go and check the windows to see if there was a way in so he would not have to bust open the door. As he looked in all of her windows he realized that this was taking way too long. He came around to the door and kicked it in.  
  
Sara was completely unconscious by the time Nick reached her.  
  
"Sara, Sara, are you okay? Oh my gosh Sara please wake up. Please, Sara!"Nick was yelling.  
  
Suddenly Sara's neighbor, who had heard all of the noise Nick was making, came running in. "What the heck is going on in here?" he asked.  
  
Nick quickly yelled for him to call an ambulance.  
  
The neighbor did as he was told, and got some towels for Sara's head wound. Nick took the towels and put pressure on the wound. All the time he keep saying, "Please, I need you Sara, please stay here with me. You don't know how much I need you."  
  
As the paramedics loaded Sara into the ambulance, Nick asked if he could come with her.  
  
"I'm sorry, sir. Only family I'm afraid." The paramedic responded.  
  
"But..."Nick started.  
  
"I'm sorry, sir. We really need to go. You can meet us at the hospital though." With that the paramedic hopped into the ambulance and they were gone.  
  
Nick watched sadly as they drove off, but suddenly realized what he needed to do. He had to go and meet them at the hospital. He had to be there for Sara.  
  
Sara was thinking of all the things that had happened to her in her life. One of the moments that she kept remembering was all the times she had spent with Nick.  
  
I ruined it, she kept realizing as she remembered all these moments. I am going to wake up and he is not going to be here. Or he is going to realize all the problems I have and he will hate me. He will never want to see me or even know me any more.  
  
Nick was talking to the doctor. The doctor had told him that she had taken something. It had a very bad side effect and caused her to pass out. When she passed out she must have hit her head on something. Thus causing the head wound.  
  
"She is stabilized and resting peacefully in her room. We gave her some medication so that when she wakes up, she will not be in too much pain. You can go in if you would like. But remember not to stay for too long. She needs her rest."  
  
"Thank you Doctor." Nick said this and then hurried off into Sara's room.  
  
As soon as he walked in there he noticed that Sara looked the most peaceful he had seen her all night. He also noticed how beautiful she looked.  
  
I have to find out why she left so early. I have to find out what is wrong with her, Nick thought to himself. What happened to her? I just don't understand any of this.  
  
Nick decided that he should sit down. He decided to move the chair closer to her bed. As he got settled in the chair he took Sara's hand.  
  
Sara felt something. It was something pulling her back to reality.  
  
I don't want to open my eyes, Sara thought. I don't want to know what happened. I don't want to know where I am. I just want for everything to end.  
  
However, she remembered all those great times she had with Nick. I can't just let everything end like this. I can't do this just for me; I can't just walk away from this and everything out. That isn't fair to him.  
  
She slowly opened her eyes and looked at her surroundings. She saw that she was in a hospital room. She saw Nick sitting there holding her hand. He hadn't seen her eyes open.  
  
Wow. I really hadn't expected to see him here, she thought. I can't believe this. After everything I did, he is here with me now.  
  
Sara decided to let Nick know that she was awake. She squeezed his hand lightly. All of a sudden Nick's eyes moved to see if she was awake.  
  
"Sara! You're awake. How are you feeling? Are you okay? Do you need anything? What happened?"  
  
"Nick slow down. I'm fine and no I do not need anything, not right now anyway. But I do have a few questions for you."  
  
"Okay, what?" Nick noticed that she had deliberately not answered his last question, but decided to ignore that for right now. Maybe she does not want to talk about it yet.  
  
"How did I get here?" Sara asked, she had remembered everything leading up to blacking out. However, she did not know how she ended up in the hospital.  
  
Nick proceeded to tell her about how he had felt that something wasn't right and then went to her apartment. When she hadn't answered her door, he told her how he knocked it in and then found her on the floor.  
  
"Wow."  
  
"Sara, do you want me to call anyone. I mean should I tell the rest of the gang you are hurt and that I have seen you? You know they are worried about you. I mean none of us have seen you in the past six months."  
  
"No, please don't. Not right now. I will probably won't you to later, but not right now."  
  
"Okay then."  
  
Just as Nick said this, the Doctor walked in and said that he should go.  
  
"I'll be back later Sara."  
  
"Okay, thanks for being here."  
  
As Nick left, Sara started thinking about all that has happened in the past twenty-four hours. She also thought of how Nick had been there for her. How could I have let things get so out of hand. I don't understand this at all.  
  
Nick was thinking of the events of the last twenty-four hours as well. He however, was confused about a lot of things. Especially what had Sara taken that had knocked her out. Was that why she had decided to see me for the first time in six months?  
  
I have to tell someone, was Nick's immediate reaction. Maybe someone could help me sort this out.  
  
As Nick was thinking about what to do, his phone started ringing.  
  
"Stokes... oh hey Cath, what's up?"  
  
"Sorry to call you on such sort notice, but we need you here Nicky. Big case just came up, and well days is too busy."  
  
"Okay, I'll be there in five minutes."  
  
As Nick hung up the phone a thought ran across his mind. I know Sara told me not to tell anyone, but maybe Catherine will know what to do.  
  
By the time Nick had reached the lab, he decided he would talk to Catherine about the situation. However, he had to do it at the right time and he didn't want anyone else to over hear their talk.  
  
"Hey Cath!" Nick said as he entered the break room where Catherine was sitting.  
  
"Yeah, what's up?" She asked him.  
  
"I need to talk to you later. Its important, but I don't want anyone to over hear us."  
  
"Okay, how about we grab some breakfast after sift?"  
  
"That sounds great."  
  
Nick walked out of the break room. As he walked out Catherine was completely confused at what Nick wanted to talk about. But didn't have long to her thoughts before she had to go back to work.  
  
Please review! I promise I will try to get the next chapter up much sooner. 


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